A 'Dickhead' in Love is a 'Dickhead' to be Feared!This deranged, tortured soul possesses an overwhelming, primeval urge for companionship. Cringingly pathetic and embarrassing, his futile attempts to befriend members of the opposite sex are always met with little response and a lot of instant pain (usually in the groin area!)
Bearing this in mind, many of these desperate 'Dickheads' have subscribed to a sickening, little known ancient technique involving exhumation and post death relationships.
After months of intensive research we eventually tracked down 'David' (pictured above) a self-certified 'Dickhead' of dubious parentage. Sadly his disturbing tale was all too familiar
"Snot miy forlt" he defended himself "Oh-k sew I'me a stewpid cnut, eye carnt dineye thart" he added.
"Art tha serimoni Wen wee gott marrid tha ring keept forlin offer finga. And wen wee tri too mayk luv ...."
"Oh Shit! he's shagging a skeleton!" our reporter exclaimed, stopping David in mid sentence.
"I think I'm going to throw up" he gasped, legging it swiftly away.
An undisclosed source informed us recently that the couple had now broken up. Apparently she gave him the elbow........four ribs, both kneecaps and several vertebrae!!
Summary.
Do not under any circumstances approach a 'Dickhead' in love. If in doubt please once again observe the Ten Metre Rule!!
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